Flashback Friday - Waiting can be the worst!

What is Flashback Friday?  Well since parenthood for me started way before this blog.  I blogged a lot in various places like Myspace, Babycenter Community, and Facebook.  For you to better understand where I come from I have decided to bring those blogs back on Fridays.  I want to be able to relate to all of you that may be going through something similar and let you know you are not alone in your feelings. I will apologize ahead of time, this is the raw stuff before I started getting better at expressing myself via blogs.  Enjoy my friends.

March 27, 2007 -  My thoughts about the amniocentesis I had and what occurred after.  

As the title says waiting for things can be the worst. I guess it all depends on what you are waiting for. I have waited in lines at the DMV (how much worse can it get, right!?) and I've waited for traffic to start to flow to get me to my destination. I have done millions of types of waiting and it doesn't get any better, but the waiting I have had to do these couple of days has had me all tied up in bunch without being able to concentrate on the most basic of things.
I had an amnio about a week and a half ago. Because I am over 35 (I know, don't be shocked! LOL) the doctor suggested I go through it. Besides there is also diabetes that runs on both sides of our family and a series of other conditions, I wanted to make sure the baby was going to be healthy.

The procedure was not half as bad as I thought it might be, especially with a giant needle going in under your belly button (ok, you can stop getting dizzy with the visual now). I just never imagined that the painful part of the whole procedure would be the waiting. Waiting just got my thoughts going in high gear, what would I do if something was not right, how would I deal with it? I think I cried once or twice because of the stress of it all, excruciating. What if the baby was less than perfect? It sounds silly, but I thought of EVERYTHING!

My mother saw how stressed I was and took me to pamper myself at the nail salon with a manicure and a pedicure, and of course words of encouragement and reassurance that everything was going to be ok. While at the nail salon I saw a young girl come in with her mother, she must have been about 22 and she had downs syndrome. I watched how her mother took care of her, and how even though she was dependent on some things, she was as normal as can be. Her mother took care of her with care and kindness, much like my mother was taking care of me.

At that moment I thought of my baby, and if something would not be ok, I would still love him the same and would deal with what could happen no matter what.

I got the call yesterday from the doctor, my baby is going to be free of all those things I feared. But I learned a lot just in the waiting. I had a few minutes of despair and I thought of all those people who are waiting, waiting for their children to get out of the preemie ward. Waiting to hear if what they have is cancer, waiting to know if a loved one will make it through the night after much illness. My heart goes out to those of you who have to wait, it's painful.

My father would say " Don't cry because you don't have shoes, there are people who have no feet".

Lesson learned Dad.

Wordless Wednesday - 2 Toddler beds + 1 Lonely toddler = 1 Shared Love

Well Good Morning!

A visit to a toddler friendly library

Yes, I used TODDLER FRIENDLY and LIBRARY in the same sentence.  Shocking I know! I have been going to our local public library for a few months now in our city.  It's very small and not quite appropriate for my two toddlers.  I always got glares stares from the other school children and parents who were trying to work on homework.  The librarian always just gave me that annoyed  sympathetic  smile, as one or both of the Things were yelling about a book or just being the loud toddlers that they are.  The last time I was at that library Thing One and Thing Two had taken stacks and stacks of books out as I frantically tried to put them back as they were pulling them out.  Call it guilt, call it stress, call it a normal day at the local library.  I was on the other side of the book shelf when I heard the library page say "OH NO, those kids are here again" as he picked up yet another stack of books that was left out.  I felt tired, defeated, and just annoyed at the comment.  I vowed never to step foot in a library until the kids were old enough and quiet enough to be accepted  appreciative of it.

Two weeks had past since our last visit and Thing One came up to me after dinner "We go to library today?" *SIGH*.  He really missed the time we spent looking for books and then reading them at home. Thanks to Mommy Guilt I decided to give the library another try.  This time I thought we could go to the public library a city over.  This library was exceptional for someone with young children.  The children's library was upstairs, separate from the adult area.  So I was sure that we would not get those annoyed stares from the adults trying to read. 

Once upstairs I was pleasantly surprised.  The homework center was separate from the special section I discovered towards the back of the room.  As we walked to the back I could hear the screeches of young children and no one seemed to look over concerned.  As a matter of fact the librarian had a great smile and said hello.  She reminded me of many of the preschool teachers I had worked with before.  It was welcoming, something the Things and I hadn't felt from the librarian before.  Thing one was the first to go and explore the computer with child friendly programs.  The computer was just at their level and had a bright easy keyboard and child size mouse.  Thing Two quickly joined in the exploring of the computer programs.  Some programs had alphabet and number recognition, while others read books, or composed music from keyboard strokes.  

Thing One exploring an Alphabet recognition program



Even Thing Two could appreciate the colorful keyboard

Popping bubbles with Keyboard that made music.

There was also a great play area with blocks, puzzles, and puppets.  It resembled a school set up.  All the children's furniture was just their size, tables, chairs and soft sofas. There were also buckets and buckets of books.  No special order for the books, just board books strewn about in buckets, on tables.  No one was particularly picking these up or worried about where the books belonged. 

Figuring out a number puzzle

That's a guilty look.  Fun play house area.

So much to do.

My favorite part of the whole experience was the bathrooms were geared towards children and their was one adult bathroom.  I'm weird like that, child sized bathrooms, where I don't have to lift a child to wash hands, but can let them do it independently is a win, win situation for me.

I'm so glad that I found a library that works for us.  Neither of us were crying or throwing a tantrum (yes I do that sometimes).  It made the whole experience much more pleasant.  The things and I are on our way to story time geared for families tonight.  Stories, songs, movements, and an art project.  Great way to start off our literary experience together.