Get up, Stand up...

Today Thing One did the most incredible thing. He stood up for someone that could not stand up for himself.  We were walking to have food at our local McDonald's.  We passed by the front of Target to get to McDonald's and a homeless man crossed our path to get to the popcorn in the trash can and proceeded to eat it. Thing One stopped in his tracks and whispered to me "Mommy he's eating from the trash!?".  I had to explain to him how not everyone has food or money to buy food so they eat where they can.  He asked if we could buy him some food.  I was so proud of him.  We bought the man some food and went about our business.  I couldn't stop thinking of the marvelous thing my little guy had thought to do.

Thing One reminded me that we as humans need to watch out for each others as humans.  It's a golden rule that Sarge had taught me. Unfortunately I couldn't see all the signs while I was growing up.  I say that with a heavy heart.  I faltered another human being at one point in my life.

I was in 5th grade in 1982 and inside I still felt like a big goof.  The dork in me was alive and well and preteens were the pits.  My body was that of a teenager more than a preteen, all kinds of awkward.  At least that is how I recall it.  I was lucky enough to have a father who recognized the signs and told me I was beautiful as I was.  Still, trying to fit in was all I wanted to do.  Subsequently I hung out with other girls I thought were cool and accepted me into their group.  It's a story that rings true for every insecure preteen trying to find there way in a clique or a group of peers.  What I didn't expect was that one girl in particular was a mean girl.

Like I mentioned earlier I had a particularly good support from my family, so her nastiness didn't get to me.  I knew how to defend myself from any little snippy comment.  Mostly I dealt with it out by being humorous. Unfortunately we all couldn't escape her.  There was one girl named Gloria that we had all grown up with.  None of us really befriended her in all the years we had been in school with her.  Gloria lived one street over from where I lived and I saw where she was living.  It was a very un-kept home and the house reflected how everyone in that family where.  Gloria often looked like she hadn't been bathed in some time and her clothing for two days was the same.  I mostly feared her, the unknown of her.  I never really addressed her and let her be.  Unfortunately Gloria met up with mean girl in the same class for 5th grade.  I was in the same class and I hung out with mean girl along with other girls.  Gloria was afraid of mean girl and the Mean girl fed off this fear.

Gloria was often subject of many of Mean girl's cruel jokes.  One day Mean girl threatened Gloria to do something. She forced Gloria to go to the restroom and take off her training bra and when she got back from the bathroom she was to hang it on the classroom door knob. Gloria did it and Mean girl laughed and had everyone in the classroom look at the door.  Laughter broke out.  I couldn't laugh. I smiled nervously, unsure if I should show my true feelings.  Inside I felt so bad for Gloria and the humiliation she was going through. Unfortunately me need to fit in outweighed what empathy I was feeling for Gloria. 

It has been 31 years since that incident and I replay that scenario in my head a lot.  Why didn't I have the courage to stand up for Gloria?  Maybe we wouldn't be best friends, but she needed someone to stand up for her.  I have often thought of how Gloria is doing and if someone had the courage to stand up for her.  I never saw her with a father, just a mother and some siblings.  I never got to know why she looked the way she did.  Her family probably didn't have the resources for food, clothing, or hygiene.  After 6th grade when we all went to different Junior High's I never saw her again.

While I may not have seen her since 6th grade she is forever burned in my memory.  Anytime I see someone being picked on, someone with no support I try to stand up for them.  No one knows their story, no one knows how much their heart hurts.  It takes two minutes of a kind word and gesture to make someone's day.  I see Gloria in every person I try to stand up for her because as a cowardly 5th grader I couldn't. 

I am proud of Thing One, he did it without a thought.  He empathized, he stood up for those that cannot stand up for themselves. He is five years old and wiser than I could have ever been at his age. 

Mama Kat's World Famous Writing Workshop: Randomness...

I am back on the wagon!!! YAY!  I missed Mama Kat's writing prompts every Thursday.  So here it is kids!  This week I choose 5 Random facts about you and your family. (inspired by Nice Girl Notes).  Read on now....

I have been on a writing hiatus for some time now.  Some of it has been by choice, but most of it is because of several personal things that have happened that I will divulge at a later time.  For now let's get reacquainted.  Here are some Random facts about me and my kin:

1. The number five was previously my lucky number.  That is until Thing One's 5th birthday party.  The big fifth birthday party was a hit.  We celebrated Thing One's birthday at Pump it Up, which is a fantastic birthday destination filled with a barrage of blow up jumpers.  I was placing a child in a jumper when my foot slipped and I caught my foot but me knee went when way and I fell the other.  Needless to say I was in a lot of pain and I thought I might have to go see a doctor.  That is of course if Mami hadn't fallen at home when we were unpacking things from the birthday party and had to be rushed by ambulance to the hospital.  I ended up eventually going to the doctor the next day only to find out that I had a partially torn ACL and that I was to stay put and not drive for almost 2 months.  Which also meant I was out of work. I am swearing off an celebrations that have the number 5 involved in them!

2. Thing Two's birthdate was suppose to be on the inaugural date of our first Black President.  Except for the fact that she decided to come six days earlier on the 14th.  I was a little upset that I didn't make it to that day.  I wanted to tell her that she was born on a historical day.  We ended up in the hospital anyway on that day because Thing Two had jaundice and was admitted.  I believe I was pumping breast milk when he was sworn in. Good times!

3. We live for "Pajama, Pancake" Sundays!  There is nothing quite like our Sundays.  Sometimes I make the pancakes and sometime it's drive-thru McDonald's. In our pajamas of course.  However there was that one time I regretted doing the pajamas in drive-thru.  Picture the hottest guy ever and there you are in flannels and your hair up in a horrid ponytail. I would just like to forget that.  Other than that we are completely happy not to have to change into regular clothes.  We watch the Sunday morning cartoons lounge around and get to lunch time and our very loving nap times in the middle of the day.  Normally by the time that is over everyone showers and we go out.  Most times though it's all about the pajama and the pancakes.
   
4. I swear Thing Two is one of the members of the children of the corn. She loves to wander around the house at night when everyone is asleep.  She's been known to be standing by my bed just staring at me sleep.  SCARIEST THING EVER!  One of my friends on facebook suggested that she might have sleep apnea.  I don't know but if she gets a crazy hat, I am letting her spend more time over at her dad's house. *shiver*
   
   
   
   
5.  Thing One is a Star Wars and computer geek.  This is all my fault.  I had put on Spike TV one day when he was 3 years old and they were having a Star Wars marathon.  Then he discovered my VHS tapes. It was all over then.  Plus he really is technologically inclined.  I am okay with it all. As long as when I am at the senior home years from now he can fix my technology. I just hope he doesn't end up like that guy in the picture above. 

There you have it folks!  Five random fact about our family that make us totally unique!

If you want some writing prompts visit this lovely Mama:

The real world starts in Kindergarten.

Do you rember Kindergarten?  Kindergarten meant learning colors and letters, writing your name, helping feed the class pet, going to get the milk from the cafeteria to bring back to class, show and tell, easel painting.  Half way through a day one of your parents came to pick you up to go home and have lunch and you would be sent off to take a nap. The good old days of Kindergarten, I remember those days fondly and often think "If only work was like Kindergarten, I need a snack and a nap right about now".  Well...that is NOT, I repeat NOT the Kindergarten of today.

My dearest Thing One will be completing 100 days of Kindergarten tomorrow.  It's been blood, sweat, and tears for 100 days.  There, I said it.  It is the hardest thing since, well since I went to college! No wait, I enjoyed college. Nothing about Kindergarten is easy.  The kids are in school all day, no naps allowed. NO SIR! No time for napping.  There is numbers to be counted by 100 and done by groups of 10.  There are sentences to be formed and read.  Alphabet...pfffshh if you didn't get it the first two weeks of school you surely were lost.  Frequently used words have replaced phonics.  Just learn it kid.  Get on it or get out.  Did I mention homework?  I don't think I ever saw homework until 4th grade. I feel like I am school too as we sit and go over homework day in and day out.

I feel as overwhelmed as my handsome Thing One.  There was so much for him to learn in the begining.  I am not just talking academically there was the whole social system.  There are not 12 other individuals to deal with, there are 20 plus children in your class plus the teacher and volunteers.  There are also the other kids and teachers from other classrooms that go out to recess with you.  Then there is falling into a routine and finding your way around school. Remembering jackets and lunch bags before going home along with that glorious homework packet.   Did I mention that Thing One had just turned five two days before Kindergarten started?  He also is learning in a Dual language classroom which is more things he needs to learn in a different language than he is use to. 

I have had two parent-teacher conferences with Thing One's teacher and many letters back and forth about my genuine concern about how he is doing in class.  He is my distracted little fellow.  I observed him in class once and it just broke my heart to see him struggle with the language and with paying attention in class.  There is so much that he is dealing with.  I don't know what to make of it.  The teacher in the last conference had some concerns with him.  She confessed to me that he tends to take longer with his work and that other children tease him and make fun of him.  It saddened me to hear that.  No one wants to hear or see there child struggle.  It takes on a geniune pain in your heart like nothing you have ever felt before. It sinks in and you are angry, sad, desperate. 

Today in our daily conversation I asked if he played with his friend Jordan.  He said Jordan was not in school.  So then I asked if he played with anyone else.  The words that came out of his mouth next broke my heart.  "Mommy no one elsewants to play with me.  They say I am different."  I stopped what I was doing and asked him "How does that make you feel?".  His response was a daggar "I get sad Mommy". 

It may be just a phase and it's all a learning process but this whole 100 days of Kindergarten has taken my breath away. I know that I just have to give Thing One more time to learn and pick up the pace.  It is similar to being new on the job.  You just have to keep doing it and eventually all things fall into place.  We have our successful days and then the not so successful days.  There will be people that will not like you and you will always have one good friend.  Life lessons truly start in Kindergarten these day.  I just hope that he knows that no matter what or who he is  I will love him as an individual.


Oh and can I get a gold shiny metal star sticker now???!!!! *sigh*